My daily struggle

[eltdf_dropcaps type=”normal” color=”” background_color=””]I[/eltdf_dropcaps] was chatting to a colleague of mine recently and I came to the realisation that often when it’s time for prayer requests many Christians do not ask for prayer regarding their daily struggles. In fact it seems like they are oblivious to them. I’ve noticed that they want prayer for external items ie. a car, a husband, a house, a new job…the list goes on and on, and this bothers me to a certain degree, as we hardly confess our sin to one another and ask for prayer regarding our daily struggles.

As I’m growing in my faith, one finds themselves seeking external benefits at first and then one realises how those do not satisfy, instead they can lead to seeking more earthly goods and losing one’s soul in the process. I’m reminded of 2 Timothy 3:2 “For men shall be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, railers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy” (ESV). This scripture is characteristic to some of the Christians I know. I’ve also been there and sometimes I find myself still there, only because I don’t acknowledge my internal need.

Our daily struggles can be well hidden, especially when one is single and living by themselves. However, they eventually come up to the surface sooner or later… In my case it was quite a slow journey before I realised what my daily struggle was.

By nature, we are all covetous – we want what others have. This is nurtured by society, especially when you meet other women who are always asking each other where they bought their dresses, shoes, or who did their hair? These moments are fluffy but they cement the need to be covetous. Even though one may not want what others have, but the desire is to be on the same level – at any cost.

Being raised by a single mother, I was told I could be anything I wanted, of course this was further enforced by my school teachers and as a teenager I actually started believing in “this theory”. I was independent from an early age and worked hard in order to succeed. I wanted to be part of the top 5 in high school and I did, my mom was proud but still set higher standards. In my last year of varsity I wanted to be the best in my class and that goal was achieved.

There was nothing wrong with being excellent with my school work but in hindsight trying to be the best messed with me. It made me proud, I didn’t learn humility, instead I learned how to be rude, unkind and critical of everyone around. I learned to see the wrong they do…but never my own. I never learned how to truly love, how to build, how to be patient, how to wait, how to trust, how to serve others…how to be content with the portion the Lord has given me. I wanted more for my own glory and the traits Timothy speaks of above were very evident in my life.

[eltdf_blockquote text=”This deep-rooted sin started off as a harmless seed which has now grown and was infiltrating my marriage, my church and work life. Wanting a life of ease with no complications or inconveniences is what everyone longs for, but a Christian life is full of trials that James says we should “count it all joy and endure”.” title_tag=”h2″ width=””]

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” (James 1:2-4 ESV).

I will be made complete in trials! This for me is a reassuring hope. I’m also thankful for David’s 73rd psalm as it has shown me how to delight in God even with the mess going around me. That Psalm has taught me to trust, submit, listen, be slow to speak, to be satisfied and still before God, no matter the cost. This, I confess doesn’t come naturally to me. This is a daily struggle and my prayer request. Pray that I may not be covetous and want a life of ease, but be content with where God has placed me in order that I may be perfect, complete and lacking nothing.



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